Trissa died this morning. I found out from my father because I missed Ashley’s call. Funny, after everything, I found out the hard way that I still cared about this woman. I was pretty sure I had removed every last little bit of that but apparently I was wrong. Her death and this realization threw me for a bit of a loop and kind of knocked me down a peg of two.
Sadly I never saw a time when she was able be a mother to my children again.
Rumor had it she was clean for about a month. Apparently she was on oxygen because after all she did to herself, her lungs just couldn’t keep up. My hope is that her body just got too tired to go on, that it was not an over dose.
I never really saw her suffering. I don't know what kept eating at her. Was she punishing her self? Was she trying to escape? I will never really know. I do know it effected every one around her. I hope she found some sort of peace.
I am so full of mixed emotions. Mad at her for doing this to herself, Ashley, Raelynn and I, not to mention her parents and other family. Relieved, that the back and forth swing is finally over. Sad that it had to end this way. God damn it, she was the mother of my children. She should have cared for them instead of stealing from them. No matter how bad she had to feed the junkie.
Ashley was a mess on the phone acting strong. Raelynn sounded fine, probably the influence of Ray her fiancé, holding her together.
What a fine mess we find ourselves in.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment